Ganun pala yun
Personally, ayoko talaga ng sinusungitan ako. Umiilaw yung invisible sungay ko. Lalo na kung hindi naman ako nagmaldita sa’yo.
Pero, yung sungitan mo yung anak ko ay ibang usapan yun.
Ganun pala ‘yun. Kapag nasusungitan yung anak ko, parang gusto kong umiyak. Feeling ko lang, in her innocent mind, all that she wanted to do is to make lambing. She wants your attention, okay. But that’s because gusto nyang maglambing. Yun lang. Napapagalitan ko din naman sya minsan. Kaya nga after nun niyayakap ko sya agad. Nakakakonsensya kasi. Pero pag mali naman ineexplain ko sa kanya. Tingin ko naman napipick up nya.
Ayoko ding nakikita yung bata na lumalapit sa daddy nya but because he’s working, I needed to get her and put her attention to other stuffs. I alwas hate that scenario. Siguro kasi I’ve always felt like everybody’s busy as I grow up kaya ganun. I want to pay attention as she grows up so I can tell what she wants and what she doesn’t.
So, ayun na nga! Ganun pala yun.
Mister went home last night with a box of donut sampler. Guess what? All-smile si Jhia na sumalubong sa kanya to get the pasalubong. Haha. With that, ok na din ako. Feeling ko, bawing bawi na sya.
Every day, every situation we’re in, ang dami kong nadidiscover na bago. I guess end of the line is always that family life changed me. Gone were the days na it’s about me. Now it’s all about the little kid and the things that will make her feel happy and loved.
There are times na kinakaen ako ng thought na I should go back to work soon. Naiisip ko kasi na hindi ito ung buhay na pinangarap ko. I mean, I never wanted to be a plain housewife. Feeling ko nabobobo na ako and parenting is all I knew. Feeling ko I can never get back the career I had before I gave birth. Feeling ko wala na akong ibang gawin and that napako nalang ako sa gawaing bahay at gawaing nanay. Pero looking at Jhia and all that she is right now and all that she’s becoming, nararamdaman ko naman yung saysay ng pagtalikod ko sa career ko. She’s growing up a bibo kid. She’s becoming more like me in many ways, wag nya lang sana makuha yung kamalditahan ko. Pero in a way, ok lang din, basta nasa lugar naman.
So yun. Family above everything. Yun lang naman ang pinakaimportante para sakin.